Dezzart Photography is me behind the camera.
Photoshoot I did recently with amazing model and performer Riannaconda.
Thank you very much! I’ve been performing for two years now and modeling since 2009 and I still have things I’m self conscious about. I definitely have my times of being confident, but that has come with time, acceptance and working hard to be the person I want to be.
The main thing in my life that I’m thankful for is that I didn’t let my similar thoughts keep me from doing what I love doing. There were many times I thought “I’ll do what I want to do when my body is like this…” before I started performing or doing nude art modeling, I still don’t have the body I pictured I’d have to feel comfortable enough to perform and I’m so glad I didn’t wait because I would have missed out on the years I’ve spent doing what I love anyways. The beauty of burlesque is there’s no body type for it, I see it as an expression of self love that other people enjoy watching you show to the world.
Basically what I’m trying to say is I’m not on some confident pedestal far away from where you’re at and if you want to be where I’m at it’s reachable and I’m more than open to giving any advice I can offer.
very chilling topic on twitter right now.
i have my own reasons for #WhyIStayed, and looking through this hashtag, i can see so many women and men who were lost, just as i was.
i stayed because it was the first time i felt important to anyone. he “loved” me. when he said he would die if i left him, i thought it passionate. when he started showing up unannounced at my house, because my friends told him my brother’s friends were over, i thought the jealousy was endearing.
then he tried to kill himself when i left town for two days. he was convinced that i would find someone else, in a town where i knew no one. i came back home, and promised i would never leave.
the manipulation and emotional abuse became physical—but only once. he slammed me against a wall after i made a joke about dumping him once i started college. i hid the bruises from my family, for weeks. that was the moment i decided to get out, no matter what happened. for some people, it only takes one time. others need more than one. and some people never make it out alive.
it is not always easy to “just leave.” it is a blessing if you are able to leave, with no consequences.
I’m not very active on my twitter, but this was something I simply had to join in on as it’s something I’ve gone through. I made two posts of my own and read through so many. It’s been a hard month or so dealing with these memories specifically and this has helped in a strange way. So many people who have made it out and share their stories on how it’s never so simple to just leave.
It can come from anywhere really. Every routine involves music, costumes, themes, etc. Sometimes I’ll listen to a song and be inspired, sometimes I’ll see costume pieces or have ideas for costumes that inspires me, and sometimes preexisting characters or general things I love inspire me to make themed routines based on them. Sometimes those are the hardest because I think it’s easiest starting from the music and building off of that then it is to find the perfect song for a routine you have in your head based on a character or theme.
Hehehe, right!? Thank you. I never want to force her into any of the things I’m into if she doesn’t want to so I was so excited when she brought up wanting to cosplay with me and we had tons of fun. We have two or three future matching cosplay plans together that she wants to do.
So you were a huge fan of my performing (being a pseudo-stripper) and modeling including me with other women, which is in fact not fake lesbian as I’m bisexual which is me being open about my body and sexuality, something that does sometimes result in children… and my having a child then makes everything I do not okay? My parents know about what I do and are supportive because I was lucky enough to be raised by parents that didn’t make me feel shamed about my body or sexuality and I will raise my daughter the same. She can make her own choices and I’m sure as a result she’ll never make anonymous messages shaming others and telling them they should have gotten an abortion instead of being a loving parent that happens to be fine with nudity.